The good in today:

• Being the person a stranger needed to talk to, letting her know that she isn't alone.
• Giving my time to let others show their children a new home so that the children feel more confident about where they are going.
• Staying calm through another challenging bedtime for a child. It's been a number of difficult nights, but I'm helping her work through them while still staying calm myself. "You are worth waiting for" seems to be sinking in and might be making a difference.
• Waffles.
• Making the time to exercise even thought it was 10 pm.

I learned this poem years ago, in junior high.  My class has to each learn a poem to recite, and was the one I selected.  Every once in a while, I think of it again, as I've never forgotten in.  Something about it touches me.  Perhaps it is the fact that I grew up inland, yet I always longed to see the see.  Vacationing in Maine the times that we have done it was magical.  The sound of the waves, the scent of the air.  I could sit and stare at the ocean for hours.  

Kansas Boy
By Ruth Lechlitner

This Kansas boy who never saw the sea
Walks through the young corn rippling at his knee
As sailors walk; and when the grain grows higher
Watches the dark waves leap with greener fire
Than ever oceans hold. He follows ships,
Tasting the bitter spray upon his lips,
For in his blood up stirs the salty ghost
Of one who sailed a storm-bound English coast.
Across wide fields he hears the sea winds crying,
Shouts at the crows - and dreams of white gulls flying.

Passage of Time, take two

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. ~e.e. cummings

One is not born a woman, one becomes one. ~Simone de Beauvoir, The Second Sex, 1949

If nothing ever changed, there would be no butterflies. ~Author Unknown

...and slowly, with a little fanfare, another child starts the transition to adulthood.

Creative Kids Continued

For the holidays this year, Simon received his first Erector set. He thought it was wicked cool since he has been wanting to use Vincent's forever. Simon's is the younger child version, larger plastic parts instead of tiny metal pieces.

So the boys were playing together when they popped downstairs to show me their latest creation. Instead of a car or some other traditional Erector Set vehicle-type creation they made...a helmet and sword.

It was so funny to see.

Tinker Toys

Simon and Vincent received a set of large Tinker Toys for the holidays. These are great toys; I remember building fabulous things with Tinker Toys as a kid. True to form, though, my in-laws never get quite the right thing. They found not regular Tinker Toys, but the jumbo ones, so we have Tinker Toys with wheels the size of saucers and foot-long sticks.

Anyways, Simon was just playing with them, putting wheels on what I thought where axles. No. He laid down on the floor on his back, put an axle/two wheel combination in each hand and started panting.

He made dumbbells for himself.

Swell

There is nothing quite like going to check on your precious children just before you are ready to collapse from exhaustion. The little faces, sound asleep, always look so angelic and it melts the heart no matter how tough the day was.

It is far less special to go check on them and find one covered in vomit after puking in his sleep. Such joy to clean up that up from the floor, wall, bed, bedclothes and child as the clock gets closer to midnight.

Can you tell which experience I had last night?

Oh, the joys of being a parent.

Good at this

I started doing yoga again recently. I have been doing a 25 minute daily video at home until I become a little more flexible again, then I will be going to the studio once more. Simon is all about doing yoga with me, just like Vincent used to enjoy doing Pilates. It is always fun to watch kids this age try to doing these positions.

The other day, Simon and I were doing our yoga, and he kept popping in and out until we got to the end. When the instructor announced "It is time for relaxation pose", Simon perked right up. "Oh," he said, "I'm good at this one."

Yes, the position that requires laying flat on your back without moving. He is good at that one.

Phenomenal Woman

By Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size   

But when I start to tell them,

They think I’m telling lies.

I say,

It’s in the reach of my arms,

The span of my hips,   

The stride of my step,   

The curl of my lips.   

I’m a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,   

That’s me.

I walk into a room

Just as cool as you please,   

And to a man,

The fellows stand or

Fall down on their knees.   

Then they swarm around me,

A hive of honey bees.   

I say,

It’s the fire in my eyes,   

And the flash of my teeth,   

The swing in my waist,   

And the joy in my feet.   

I’m a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That’s me.

Men themselves have wondered   

What they see in me.

They try so much

But they can’t touch

My inner mystery.

When I try to show them,   

They say they still can’t see.   

I say,

It’s in the arch of my back,   

The sun of my smile,

The ride of my breasts,

The grace of my style.

I’m a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That’s me.

Now you understand

Just why my head’s not bowed.   

I don’t shout or jump about

Or have to talk real loud.   

When you see me passing,

It ought to make you proud.

I say,

It’s in the click of my heels,   

The bend of my hair,   

the palm of my hand,   

The need for my care.   

’Cause I’m a woman

Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,

That’s me.

In the warmer months, I love to whip up a big salad to take to the office for lunch. Rip up a little lettuce and spinach, toss in a few walnuts and dried cranberries, chop up a hard boiled egg or a little meat left over from the night before if we have any, drizzle it all with a touch of vinaigrette. It is so easy to do, taking just a few minutes.

I am frequently dismayed, however, by how often people in the office say something like "Oh, that looks great. Where did you get it?"

The assumption is that I have bought a prepared salad. Why on earth? There are few things easier to make than a big salad, and it is such an inexpensive thing to throw together for lunch.

Make your own meals, people.

I went to the local arts center this evening to hear an author speak. I enjoy going to these talks, whenever time permits. I usually bring along a mindless knitting project, often the cuff or instep of a sock, something that I can work on without thinking about as I listen to the author.

This evening, I brought nothing with me. My latest sock is waiting for me to kitchener stitch the toe together, and I have not yet cast on a new one. So, I sat that with my hands doing nothing. I sat simply listening, watching, laughing.

It felt strangely decadent.

A house does not feel like home to me until the walls have art hanging on them. We moved in here ten years ago. Two young kids, new house, we didn't have a lot of money. Still, art popped up here and there, covering our wall. Print outs of Impressionist masterpieces by my favorites - Van Gogh, Monet, Degas. We grew our collection of larger pieces slowly, and a few years ago began adding a couple pieces of "real" art.

This year, Luis started pestering me to start putting some of my photographs on the wall instead of those old printouts and lithos purchased off eBay all those years ago. I have been transitioning the pieces slowly.

I have to say that I'm so glad he got a bee in his bonnet about this. I love walking into the dining room and seeing the canvas of a photo I took at a friend's farm. I makes me smile to see my photos of espresso and onions in the kitchen. I love seeing Vincent sitting in a culvert and Simon's crawling tush in the dining room, a rock cairn in the library.

I've always loved taking photos, and this is a continuation of that. I do not consider myself very artistic, but this...it makes me happy.

"All around you, people will be tiptoeing through life, just to arrive at death safely. But dear children, do not tiptoe. Run, hop, skip, or dance, just don't tiptoe."
— Shane Claiborne

I saw a version of this quote at a friend's home this evening. I loved it so much that I had to look up the original, and the original is even more wonderful that what I had seen.

I have been looking for a quote to put on my kitchen wall for a few years now. Nothing has ever resonated perfectly without being boringly cliche. This might just be the right one.

I saw this on StoryPeople today.

It's an invention, he said. What's it do? I said. I don't know, he said. It's not finished yet.

It reminded me of Vincent.

Isabella had a slumber party over the weekend, and I love listening to the girls chatter away in the next room when they don't know I am listening.

All ten girls were playing some convoluted imagination game involving neighboring countries and their governments when I heard my favorite quote of the party:

Girl 1: Attack!!!! Let's invade!
Girl 2: Hey! Don't invade us. We are a peace-loving country.
Girl 1: We know. Why do you think we are invading you??

The politics of war, boiled down to the bare minimum.

I made the strangest cake today.  The only ingredients are eggs, sugar, ground almonds, baking powder, and five entire clementines - skin, pith and all - topped with dark chocolate.

I found the recipe in Green & Black's Chocolate Recipes, a cookbook that I swear makes me gain weight just by reading it.  No photos, just a simple ingredient list and short set of directions.  The first step of simmering five entire clementines for two hours intrigued me.    

I cheated a little bit and cut in before it sat overnight.  The recipe did say to let it sit so that the flavors could mingle best.  It was truly yummy, and I can't wait to see how it tastes tomorrow. This one is so very easy, but would make a unique party dessert.  It will be made again.

Later this week - Italian Venison Agrodolce from the same book.  Can you tell what cookbook I was reading this last week?

I must have company soon so that I can also try the Salted Caramel Tart.  Luis is not a big chocolate fan, and I don't dare make many of these recipes without others here to eat them with me.  The Clementine Cake here is an exception.  It is practically healthy what with only 1 cup of sugar and one 3 oz bar oc chocolate to balance out those clementines and 3 cups of ground almonds with their healthy proteins and fats.

At least that is what I am telling myself.

Fortune Cookie revelation

Long time, no blog, eh?  I keep meaning to get back on the wagon.  I even have wonderful posts all composed in my head.  Alas, I sit down at the computer and do something else instead. 

Tonight, though, I am sitting down and am writing what I intended to.

So, about a month ago, my mother brought down a bag of fortune cookies.  I have no idea why she had an entire bag of fortune cookies, but she did and so we were gifted with them. What does that have to do with tonight's spaghetti and meatball dinner then? 

Luis opened the cupboard after and saw these fortune cookies.   He immediately pulled them out and lamented the fact the we forgot them last night.  Last night, we had fried rice, pot stickers and spring rolls for dinner.  So, Luis handed out the fortune cookies, and the three older children ripped into them. 

Simon, on the other hand, had a little difficulty.  He struggled and strained to crack the cookie apart.  He tried setting it on the table and hitting it.  No luck.  He simply could not get his cookie to crack apart.  Finally, Luis held it on edge so that when Simon hit it, the cookie cracked.  Simon very seriously handed Luis his fortune to be read. 

What did it say? 



We've struggled with helping Vincent learn to speak in an understandable manner for years. Goodness, back when he was two, we just struggled to get him to speak. He was such a master of non-verbal communication, and truly he still is.

His inability to properly say some sounds has impacted his reading ability. While I've asked others for advice on and off over the years and have searched the web for help too, this spring was enough. We reached out for help from a speech therapist. His speak has improved tremendously. While I am occasionally frustrated because while honestly, she does not a thing differently that what I had been doing, Vincent listens to her and follows her direction like he never followed mine, I am very happy with the results.

He is more understandable, and now his reading is starting to blossom.

The other day, I had the best proof of his burgeoning abilities. He wrote me a note asking for two pizzas for dinner with a picture of a pizza and the word "to" which he sounded out and wrote all by himself. He had occasionally wanted copy work to jot things down, but he had never attempted creative spelling at all before that. bliss

I love seeing little notes from him with things like "to tls" (two tools) and "misin baj" (missing badge) written down in occasionally backwards letters. This is such a huge milestone, and I am so thrilled that my little man is finally here.

Notice that it is midnight and I am posting something. The is a little one sleeping in my arms, and I found our conversation just now too funny not to record for future smiles when I reread this.

Simon: (awake and crying)
Me: Ohhhh, what's up?
Simon: Meeeee.
Me: (laughs)
Simon: (gets up and starts climbing out of bed)
Me: Where are you going?
Simon: On your lap. (sound asleep twenty seconds later as he sits on my lap on the floor next to his bed)

I do enjoy how preschoolers are completely literal. Such concrete little thinkers, even when more asleep than awake.

If it is nine hundred degrees in the kitchen and everything in the kitchen is sticky, then it must be peach season.

Three more canners full of peaches have been put up. That makes twenty eight quarts so far this year. I think it might last until mid-winter if I'm lucky. Considering that Simon finally tried a bite peach in syrup tonight and promptly gobbled up half of the peach, I think I might not be so lucky. I have a quarter of a bushel left, and I want to make an utterly divine peach salsa out of that. I should have bought another half bushel from the peach delivery people yesterday. I will just have to hope that the fruit guy can give me a good price on another box or two. One bushel so far, and I have not even made a peach pie yet.

On a related note, I have been trying to get Vincent to expand the fruits that he will eat. Last year, it was only sliced apples, bananas and grape jam. This spring, he added strawberry jam and alpine strawberries. Doesn't that figure? A fruit that is the size of an m&m and not very prolific, he decides that he will eat. I'm working on expanding that patch in the garden.

Yesterday, he had to eat five spoonfuls of applesauce with dinner, and he acted like I was torturing him. Today, he had to eat one slice of a fresh peach (not even a quarter, just a slice). After eating the peach, he declared it horrible, but then said that he loves applesauce.

Go figure.

I'm going to keep on the forced fruit trying for a while longer. I need him to eat something more sustainable than bananas (oh, it kills me to buy a bunch imported, monoculture fruit every week!) and while apples are great in the fall, to buy them in the spring and summer means I'm getting imported fruits or the tail end of last year's stored harvest. I want that child to eat a little more seasonally. At least with applesauce, I put up quarts of that every year, so it is a more sustainable option.

I wonder, could I get him to eat blueberries or even pears?

Conversation with Simon last night:

Me: Time to be quiet and go to sleep, bop.

Simon: I quiet. I no talk. See, I quiet, mama. Lay in my bed; I quiet now mama. I no talk.

Me: Shhhh.

Simon: Mama, I wiwy* quiet, see? I no talk. Lay with me now, mama. I quiet!

Repeat three more times. I think he misunderstands the meaning of "quiet", eh?


* wiwy = really for those of you who do not speak Simonese.